Crammed in the back seat of a tiny taxi, we were making our way down the dark highway. It was past midnight and police patrols were parked next to every entrance to the road. Before we left the airport our driver, a large, heavy man, who filled up the whole front of the cab, crossed himself and kissed a little figurine of Mary hanging from the front mirror. We were on the red carpet leading to Rio de Jeneiro.

Jose looked around the table and asked "Do you have any questions about the Inca trail?". Indeed, we had many important questions, like who is going to carry us down when the altitude sickness kicks in, or do we need waterproof underwear and exactly how cold is it going to get at 4000 meters if we are already freezing at Cuzco's 3200 meter altitude. Typical tourist questions, typical guide answers "Don't worry, you will be alright".

You are an owner of a big dog when:

1)    You don’t need to visit the gym to get killer biceps, regular walks with Fluffy are more than enough

2)    You use both hands to pick up your dog’s poop

3)    You neuter your dog just to get rid of the inferiority complex

4)    Chihuahua owners leave the park in a hurry when they see you approaching

5)    Condo rules specifying that you need to carry your dog through the common areas make you laugh uncontrollably

6)    Your dog can seriously damage your Ikea furniture just by wagging its tail

7)    You never leave anything on the kitchen counters

8)    Your dog consumes more calories a day than your girlfriend and probably weighs more too

9)    Your pet’s name is either Zeus, Goliath, Tank, Beefy or Godzilla

10)  You are making this list just to forget that your dog ate your favorite shoes last night while you were in the washroom.